I want a wife by Judy Brady

 I Want a Wife

- Judy Brady 

The essay “I want a Wife” by a feminist writer, Judy Brady provokes a thought through which she aims to convince her readers to look objectively at a man’s viewpoints and expectations of what he thinks a wife is and what she should be. In other words, she looks at women from the point of married men and their expectations. The writer also expresses what she wants in a wife and then lists many responsibilities that she has to carry out. This essay basically reflects as to how many men’s selfish and unrealistic expectations of women’s roles still exist in today’s society. Throughout the essay, she highlights the traditional, selfish expectations that men have for their wives. She lets the audience know why she would like a wife of her own and goes into detail about the inequalities suffered by women. The writer gives the long list of household chores and responsibilities that a married woman carries out in her home and workplace. She provides numerous examples and reasons why she wants a wife and continuously shows that women’s roles are unequal to men’s.

• I want a wife who takes care of the children when they are sick. 

• I want a wife who takes care of my physical needs. 

• I want a wife who will keep my house clean. 

• A wife who will pick up after my children. 

• I want a wife who will keep my clothes cleaned, ironed, mended, replaced when needed. 

• I want a wife who will not bother me with rambling complaints 

• I want a wife who will take care of the details of my social life. 

• I want a wife who is sensitive to my sexual needs, a wife who makes love passionately and eagerly when I feel like it. 

All these things reflect the fact that a wife is playing many roles at one time. The wife takes the roles of a maid, a babysitter, a housewife, a working wife, a chef, and a calendar or day planner for not only her, but her husband and children as well. Brady expresses these actions to show the reader how illogical is it for a single person, man or woman, to fulfill every one of these duties without missing a beat.

She argues that women are treated unfairly in marriages and that it is wrong, degrading and women do not belong under the power of men. Her central argument is that women's roles in marriages are difficult and unequal to men’s. 

By using sarcastic tone throughout her essay to humorously exaggerate the wants and desires of a husband, the writer wants to persuade women to take action and stand up for themselves and not to fall under the false ideas and notions of patriarchal society. They should not continue with this trend.

A. Comprehension 

1. In one sentence, define what Brady means by wife. Does this ideal wife actually exist? Explain.

Ans : Brady is referring to a woman who makes a disproportionate amount of sacrifices for her husband in order to keep him happy; she bends constantly to his needs and takes complete control over care for the children and housework. This ideal does not exist; managing all of the tasks and responsibilities that Brady mentions would be next to impossible. Brady also describes the "wife" doing all these things being quite content about it all, which is difficult to imagine.

2. List some of the specific duties of the wife Brady describes. Into what five general categories does Brady arrange these duties?

Ans : A few of the duties Brady describes the wife doing are keeping track of appointments, cooking dinner, hosting parties, and keeping the home clean. These tasks are divided into the following categories: childcare, housework, sexual availability, appointment/event organization, and putting her career aside.

3. What complaints does Brady apparently have about the life she actually leads? To what does she seem to attribute her problems?

Ans : Her most obvious reason for "wanting a wife" is her desire to go back to school; she doesn't currently have the means to do. Her other complaints seem to stem from the smaller obligations she has in her daily life that husbands are generally not expected to have to worry about in the same way what wives are. She feels overwhelmed by how she is expected to stay on top of housework, arrange appointments for the entire family, plan and cook meals, and to put her own career aside for the sake of her husband. She seems to attribute this problem to the unjust distribution of household-centric labor between husbands and wives.

4. Under what circumstances does Brady say she would consider leaving her wife? What would happen to the children if she left?

Ans : Brady says that she would consider leaving her wife if she found a different woman "more suitable as a wife" than the one she has; she would leave her first wife solely responsible for the children.

B. Purpose and Audience 

1. This essay was first published in Ms. magazine. In what sense is it appropriate for the audience of this feminist publication? Where else can you imagine it appearing?

Ans : This essay is very appropriate for a feminist publication because it serves as a criticism of the expectations that many men have for their wives. It focuses on the immense amount of labor that women must stay on top of in their daily lives, much of which goes unappreciated or completely unnoticed by their husbands. This essay could also be appropriate for the opinion section of a newspaper.

2. Does this essay have an explicitly stated thesis? If so, what is it? If you believe the thesis is implied, paraphrase it in your own words.

Ans : No, this essay does not have a stated thesis. I believe the thesis is that she wants someone to do everything a wife does for her.

3. Do you think Brady really wants the kind of wife she describes?

Ans : She probably would like to have a wife that does everything stated in the essay. This ideal spouse does not exist, but when you love someone enough they come pretty close to it. I think Brady wrote this essay because she is tired of having the womanily responsibilities around the home and wants to go to school to learn and be higher up in society.

C. Style and Structure 

1. Throughout the essay, Brady repeats the words "I want a wife." What is the effect of this repetition?

Ans : The effect of this repetition is that it tells the reader everything a wife does that men take for granted. It shows them that there are a lot of responsibilities that a wife has

2. The first and last paragraphs of this essay are quite brief. Does this weaken the essay? Why or why not?

Ans : The briefness of these paragraphs is not an issue. They provide just enough context to frame the main body of the essay, which holds all the important information.

3. In enumerating a wife's duties, Brady frequently uses the verb arrange. What other verbs does she use repeatedly? How do these verbs help her make her point?

Ans : In addition to "arrange", Brady also makes frequent use of the verbs "care," and "make sure". These verbs all relate to organization and caregiving, which are generally tasks delegated to women. Her frequent use of these words is a way to emphasize all the different ways that women are expected to provide care and to "arrange" things.

4. Brady never uses the personal pronouns he or she to refer to the wife she defines. Why not?

Ans : She never uses personal pronouns because she does not actually want a wife, these are just the responsibilities that she has as a wife.

5. Comment on Brady's use of phrases such as of course (2, 3, and 7), needless to say (3), after all (7), by chance (8), and naturally (8). What do these expressions contribute to the sentences where they appear? To the essay as a whole?

Ans : These phrases serve as reminders that the tasks Brady is listening are often taken for granted and simply expected to be done. She is trying to point out how ingrained these roles are in society. Women are often brought up being taught how to do household chores, how to be a good hostess, etc, while such skills are far less often passed on to men. This leads to women taking on these burdens out of habit. Conversely, men who have not been made to take on such skills are unable to understand the time and energy such tasks require.